Father: I’m taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Father: So you won’t be bored. You’re going to need them there.
Worst Jokes Ever
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have no one they can call "daddy."
Someone asked me my gender... I said, "Woah, man."
Why do Americans suck at chess? Because they lost two towers.
When you go over a speed bump, but you remember that there are no speed bumps in the school zone.
9/11 is the biggest game of Jenga... ;)
What's the best way to remove gum from hair?
Cancer.
About the guy who gave Stevie Wonder a cheese grater...
He thought it was the most violent book he'd ever read.
1 like = 1 more missile aimed at a hospital.
I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a blow dryer.
Why are orphans only able to have iPhone X's? Because it doesn't have a home button.
DAD: I'm bringing your toys to the orphanage.
SON: Why?
DAD: You're going to need them.
I will never forget my grandfather's last words: “The fuck you doing with that knife?”
What did the Chinese couple name their retarded baby?
Sum Ting Wong.
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping up onions, which made me cry.
Onions was a good dog.
A Catholic priest finds a young boy crying at the top of a cliff.
“What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
The boy points down. “Mummy and Daddy were in the car and it went over the edge.”
The priest can see the flaming wreck below. He looks around and sees no one else is about and starts to unbutton his belt.
“It’s really not your day, is it?”
Why can’t orphans go on school field trips?
Parent Signature: ______
My girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile. That’s a big word for a six-year-old.
How do orphans have a family reunion?
They use a Ouija board.
Teacher: What's 3 minus 1? Me: I don't know. Teacher: How about this, you have three cakes, I take one. How many cakes do you have? Me: Three. Teacher: If I take one cake from your three, what do you have? Me: Three cakes and a dead teacher.
