Worst Jokes Ever
What is the difference between Batman and a black man?
Batman can go out at night without Robin.
Tell a woman she’s beautiful a hundred times, and she won’t believe you.
Tell a woman she’s fat once, and she will remember it for the rest of her life.
What makes an ISIS joke funny?
The execution.
What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke? Timing.
Do you have a shovel? Because I'm digging that ass.
Government Briefing:
Joe Biden had a meeting with the cabinet today...
...He also spoke to the bookcase and argued with the desk.
An old man goes to a church and is making a confession:
Man: "Father, I am 75 years old. I have been married for 50 years. All these years I had been faithful to my wife, but yesterday I was intimate with an 18-year-old."
Father: "When was the last time you made a confession?"
Man: "I never have, I am Jewish."
Father: "Then why are telling me all this?"
Man: "I’m telling everybody!"
Today, I operated on a little girl. She needed O-negative blood. We didn’t have any, but her twin sister has O-negative blood. I explained to her that it was a matter of life and death. She sat quietly for a moment, and then said goodbye to her parents. I didn’t think anything of it until after we took her blood and she asked, “So when will I die?” She thought she was going to give her life for her sister. Thankfully they both died.
The FBI wants to steal my penis. Can I hide it inside you?
Are you a raisin? Because you’re raisin' my dick.
Are you an archaeologist? Because I’ve got a bone for you to examine.
What do you call an emo kid with light up shoes?
A human chandelier.
Mom, how were hoomans made? Son, it’s because Adam and Eve were brought down by God and made babies!
Dad, how were hoomans made? Son, us humans evolved from monkeys!
Mom, Dad said hoomans were evolved from monkeys, is that true? Oh son, (ruffles smol man’s hair) your dad was telling you his side of the family, and I was telling my side :)
what's another name for cumming inside of a woman?
loading the dishwasher.
What is a orphan's favorite 🎥🍿?
Home Alone.
The reason why Trailer Park Boys is set in Nova Scotia and not Alabama is because if it was set in Alabama, then they would have to record every instance of incest. And the show's writers would need to know how to cram all of it in one season.
My mom said she will slam my head into my computer if I don't get off it. I'm not too worried though, I think she is just joking.
A guy threatened to touch me yesterday...
Why don’t you act like your hairline and kindly take several steps back?
Why did the Xbox player cross the road? To render in the buildings.