Worst Jokes Ever
My girlfriend really wants me to get her pregnant so she would have a father figure in her life for once.
What does a bridge and a fat chick have in common?
They’ll eventually get laid by a Mexican.
Why did the dick go insane?
Someone kept messing with his head.
A genealogist looks at the family tree.
A gynecologist looks up the family bush.
What do you call a dog turd in China?
Waste of food.
An optimist says, "The glass is half full."
A pessimist says, "The glass is half empty."
A scientist walks by and says, "You guys are both wrong. The glass is technically completely full because it is half filled with air."
Then Africa comes by and says, "Stop arguing. At least you guys have water!"
We send millions of mosquito nets to Africa; we can save millions of mosquitoes from dying of AIDS.
What did God say when he made the first woman?
"Where is your dick at?"
Are you a keyboard, because I wanna tap you all night long.
What's black, white, and red all over? A nun on her period.
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Did you hear about the fire at Noelle's place?
Her sister is a real Dess-ember!
Politicians and diapers have one thing in common.
They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
What is the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?
Usain Bolt can finish a race.
Your dad is so fat that when he walks past the TV, I miss three episodes of South Park.
A Thai woman ran into a wall. What does she break?
Her boner.
What is the worst part about making an Asian girl squirt?
She charges you for extra sauce!
How can you be fast and slow at the same time, getting a gold medal in the Special Olympics?
Your mom is so stupid that she thought LGBTQ was a sandwich.
What was the comment that Vice President Harris said in the United States Senate when a blue dog democrat in the United States Senate called Vice President Harris a bitch?
Kibbles 'N Bits!! Kibbles 'N Bits!! I is going to get me some Kibbles 'N Bits!!