Worst Jokes Ever
Are you a keyboard, because I wanna tap you all night long.
Why did the dwarf work at Tesco?
Because every little bit helps!
Your hairline is so long, people call it "The Natural Disaster!"
Why does Miss Piggy douche with honey?
Because Kermit likes his pork sweet and sour.
Teacher: How much is a gram?
Tyronne: Uhmm, depends on what you need.
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Did you hear about the fire at Noelle's place?
Her sister is a real Dess-ember!
Your dad is so fat that when he walks past the TV, I miss three episodes of South Park.
How can you be fast and slow at the same time, getting a gold medal in the Special Olympics?
I feel bad for all American Clash Royale players.
They always start with two towers downed.
Why does your grandma like gardening so much?
Because she loves getting dirty down on her knees.
What’s a vegetable’s favorite dance?
The cabbage patch.
Gay gang members don't do drive-bys, they do fruit roll-ups.
What's black, white, and red all over? A nun on her period.
Why did the dick go insane?
Someone kept messing with his head.
What do you call a dog turd in China?
Waste of food.
An optimist says, "The glass is half full."
A pessimist says, "The glass is half empty."
A scientist walks by and says, "You guys are both wrong. The glass is technically completely full because it is half filled with air."
Then Africa comes by and says, "Stop arguing. At least you guys have water!"
What is the difference between white people and coal?
It’s bad for the environment to burn coal.
Why did the telemarketer cross the road?
I don't know.
I don't know either, but I hope there was a car coming.
Politicians and diapers have one thing in common.
They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.