Worst Jokes Ever
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.
One turns to the other and says, "I think I've lost my electron."
The other asks, "Are you sure?"
"Yes," the first says, "I'm positive!"
One day, a little girl was texting her friend. "Guess what, Angelica!" said the little girl.
"What?" Angelica replied.
"I'm a guy."
What’s the difference between a hooker and a cat?
I haven’t banged a hooker.
Why did the frog take the bus to work today?
His car got toad away.
You are so fat that when you wear a yellow raincoat, a running person behind you shouted, "Taxi!"
Wanna hear a joke?
No, I'm already looking at one.
You're so fat, the only thing you could be for Halloween is the Kool-Aid Man.
Why is the Tower of Pisa leaning?
It has better reflexes than the Twin Towers.
I give these jokes a 9/11.
Guess what you get when you cross a dark side and your king?
Q: Why can't pilots play Jenga?
A: Because they will just hit the Twin Towers.
I'm looking for the bartender.
Person named Bart:
How do astronomers organize a party? They planet.
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he can't get home.
"Suicide bomber kills 44 people in Pakistan mosque." Damn, that's a crazy K/D. He must be hacking.
"I wish I was either Christmas lights or a mistletoe."
"Why?"
"Because I want to hang!"
Your hairline is pushed back farther than G.T.A. 6.
I saw a girl crying. I asked her, "Where are your parents?" She cried as I got kicked out of the orphanage.
If lint comes from pockets, where does a cockroach come from?
What do you call an emo with a knife?
A cutting board.