Worst Jokes Ever
What do you get when you cross a German and a Mexican? A “BeanerSchnitzel”!
what do you call a rape victim in Ukraine?
Debris.
What happens when a black person gets in a car? The check oil light turns on.
What do women, tornadoes, and hurricanes have in common? They all get the house.
There was an illegal alien woman who wanted to be called "undocumented." So, I had "undocumented" sex with her and threatened to have her deported if she reported me for rape. I'd call it even.
I wouldn't call a Suicide Help-line even if my life depended on it.
What is the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus?
It only takes one nail to hang a painting.
Q: What's the difference between a fetus and an onion?
A: One makes you cry when you chop it into pieces.
What if your Corona test is neutral?
What can you give a white person that you can't give to a black person?
A black eye.
Did you know if you give a guy a plane ticket, he flies once, but if you push him out of a plane, he flies for the rest of his life.
Don't be sad, because that's das backwards and das not good.
What's a prisoner's favorite game?
Hangman!
It's muffi time, 'cause I wanna die, die, die.
So I became a teacher in a school for disabled children.
A kid wanted to ask me a question, so I told him to stand while he address me. 💀
What's worse than getting raped in a cemetery? Finding someone else's semen in your mom's corpse.
Q: Why did the Koala fall off the tree? A: Because it was dead.
Q: Why did the second Koala fall off the tree? A: Because it was hit by the first Koala.
Q: Why did the third Koala fall off the tree? A: Because it thought it was a game and joined in.
Ahem... if somebody you don't like, or somebody random just calls you in general,
answer the phone with this:
"Hello, thank you for choosing Mama's Pizzeria/Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce, how may I help you?"
or
"Hello, this is David's Orphanage, you make them, we take them, how may I help you?"
Some people's reactions are priceless, and then they wonder about your mental health.
What do you call a black comedian?
Dark Humor.
Why was Michael Jackson fired as a guitar teacher?
Because he fingered a minor.