Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a warrior that's going to bed?
A knight knight.
It is reported that when Churchill met Stalin at Yalta, they discussed their hobbies.
Churchill said: "I collect the jokes people tell me about me."
"That's a coincidence," said Stalin, "I collect the people who tell jokes about me."
If someone calls you dirty minded just say:
"You are dirty minded as well if you understand what I'm saying."
What are fish not allowed to have?
Seaweed.
"Hotel Rwanda" has a high score on Rotten Tomatoes, but their Yelp reviews are terrible.
I don't think I'm allergic to this.
What’s Stephan Hawking's favorite dance move?
The robot.
Why did the emo break up with her boyfriend?
He didn't wanna hang out.
Me: Mom, the weight scale wants your weight, not your phone number!
Why did the emo kid not cross the road?
He was waiting for a car.
Welcome to Arby's, where your babies become our gravy!
What do the Titanic and the Montréal Canadiens have in common? They both sank to the bottom of the Atlantic.
What did the depressed kid do in P.E.? They played with the jump rope, but they used it the wrong way.
Did you know that McDonald's made a Michael Jackson burger?
It’s a 50-year-old piece of meat in a 12-year-old bun.
Did you know that a majority of the U.S. is afraid of the dark?
Especially if they are right behind you at the ATM.
Dark humor is like food, some just don't get it.
Wanna know why I don’t make suicidal jokes?
Because I am one.
Why do orphans only have 363 days?
They don’t have Mother’s Day or Father’s Day.
Comment and join Dumbledore's army in the community to give someone you hate permanent bad luck.
I recently became the coach of an orphanage baseball team.
Because I hate dealing with parents.