Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car.

If an emo kid and the quiet kid had a fight, the quiet kid would win because the emo kid would cut himself to death.

"Poor old fool," thought the gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. He invited the old man inside for a drink.

The gentleman asked, "So how many have you caught today?"

The old man replied, "You're the eighth."

Why am I so successful?

When I was told to go big or go home, I only had one option.

Why do orphans eat cereal with water?

Because their dad left and never came back home with the milk.

Today when I looked in the mirror, I stopped and simply said: "It's ok, what's inside matters the most, right?"

What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common? There used to be two of them, but now it's a sensitive subject.

An American and a Russian are talking. The American says, "We in America have the best democracy. We can stand in front of the White House and shout with impunity: \"The American President is a moron!\""

"We can do that too," says the Russian, walking with the American to the Kremlin and shouting: "The American President is a moron!"