Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can't hear an enzyme.
So, you're into pronouns? Let me she/them titties.
What do you get if you cross diarrhea with incest?
I don't know.
Neither do I, but it runs in the family.
what's the difference between morbid humor & dark humor?
dark humor fits 10 people in 1 container.
morbid humor fits 1 person on ten containers.
Me: Hey, are your parents home?
Orphan: (crying) Stop calling here!
My parents were concerned when I said I like to bleed, but at least I cut my risk of cancer and stroke in half.
You can understand depression if you are still in school and get bullied by bullies, punished by teachers, and scolded by parents for being that quiet kid who says nothing.
Why didn't Trump beat Biden?
Because he couldn't trump that bitch!
A teacher in Scunthorpe asks a class what their favorite football team is, saying, "Raise your hand if it is Scunthorpe." Every student but one raised their hand. The teacher asks, "Why don't you support Scunthorpe?" The child answers, "My parents support Grimsby, and so do I." The teacher comes back with, "Why are you copying your parents? What if your mum was a prostitute and your dad a druggie?" The child answers, "Then I'd support Scunthorpe like you dirty bastards!"
"Mum, I just won this phone in a race!"
"Who was in the race?"
"The owner of the phone. And the police. I think they're at the door to congratulate me!"
I got in big trouble the other day, though it was pretty unfair. Babies kick pregnant women all the time, and yet I got arrested anyways.
People always told me to open doors for elders. So I opened the plane door 5,000 feet up in the air for a grandma.
What do you call a rapper in a wheelchair?
Young Boy Never Walk again.
This dwarf was being mean to me, so I said, "When you get home, I hope Snow White kicks the shit out of you."
People in plays say that everyone's life is a drama, but mine's a tragedy.
Why can't orphans never run all the bases in baseball? Because they can never make it home.
When the school shooter breaks into your classroom, so you try to say goodbye to your Roblox gf, but then the shooter's phone goes off.
There is nothing funnier than my life. (Evan 2020)
Don't be scared of skeletons.
They don't have the guts for murder.
You're not completely useless. You can always be used as a bad example.