Worst Jokes Ever

Yo mama is so skinny, she can dodge raindrops.

I told kids to make a family tree. God, I love working at the orphanages.

A lot of people ask why I only make jokes about Paul Walker and no one else.

Because they didn’t have as big of an impact as him.

what is the fastest country? iran.

What do you call an orphan taking a picture with it's family?

A self-fie.

Me and my friend were roasting each other. She said, "You look like a Reese's cup." I replied, "You're so old, your pubic hairs are 50 shades of gray."

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can't unscrew a pregnant woman.

What's a similarity between a broken lightbulb and a pregnant woman?

They're both accidents.

Yo mama's so stupid she got locked in Mattress World and slept on the floor.

Q: Do you know why black people have nightmares?

A: Because we shot the last one who had a dream.

My pencil sharpener when I bleed:

And I don't really care how bad it hurts. Cause you broke me first.

Why do orphans support slavery?

They finally have an owner.

I love you like my cuts.

Deeply.

What’s the difference between a baby and an onion?

I cry peeling onions!

What makes sad people jump? Bridges.

Your mama so ugly that even Rick Astley had to give her up.

Slavery is like Pokémon, you gotta catch them all.

I can count the number of times I've been to Chernobyl on one hand. -- It's seven.

Curry.

A wild Iceberg appears! Titanic uses ram! It is not very effective. (Titanic sinks.)

How can you tell if your wife is dead? -- The sex is the same, but the dishes start piling up.