Worst Jokes Ever
I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage.
I lost my case.
Q: Why do Norwegian ships have bar codes on them?
A: So when they come into port they can Scan-Da-Navy-In!
Curry.
Girls are like rocks, the flat ones get skipped.
What starts off fun and ends in bankruptcy?
UNPROTECTED SEX.
What do you call an Asian prostitute?
Suck Mi Dong.
Do you know Putin?
Put in these balls in your mouth.
Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet.
He scares the shit out of it.
What do you call disabled people that follow politics?
A special interest group.
I asked my wife if I could use toys during sex last night. You should've seen her face when I rolled my Hot Wheels across her tits.
Why is a moon rock tastier than an Earth rock?
Because it’s a little meteor.
Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs?
Because they don't want to be mistaken as feminists.
A boy went to a costume party with a girl on his back. Someone asked him what he was supposed to be. He answered, "A turtle."
"Then why do you have a girl on your back?" the guy asked again.
The boy answered, "It's Michelle."
Why are mountains always tired? Because they don't Everest.
So this guy is talking to his buddy about his flying lessons. "My first time in the air, my instructor informed me that he was an 8th degree black belt and homosexual, and if I don't succumb to his sexual advances I would have to jump out of the plane," and his buddy says, "Well, did you jump?" The guy says, "Yeah, a little at first."
Me and my friend went to the park. After a while, we grabbed our little princess and said, "It's time to go, sweetie." But before we could go, someone said, "Stop them, they have my daughter!"
I was thinking about you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.
What did me and my uncle call hide and seek? Naked and afraid.
What’s the last thing Tickle Me Elmo receives before leaving the factory?
Two test tickles.
What is a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross-country!!!