Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

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So little Johnny was on the bus, and the bus driver already hated him. So he started to talk to himself JUST loud enough for the bus driver to hear.

"If my dad was a bull, and my mom was a cow, that would make me... a little bull!"

"If my dad was a rooster, and my mom was a hen, that would make me... a little rooster!"

And by this point, the bus driver was fed up with him, so he said:

"Ok little Johnny, I got one for you: If your dad was a drunk, and your mom was a whore, what would that make you?"

Little Johnny smiled and said: "A bus driver!"

Hey JFK, what would you do if you were in a fight?

JFK: Well, I'd give them a piece of my mind.

What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? You slap her on the ass and tell her to get back to work.

You do 1 line, you're not a crackhead. You drink 1 beer, you're not an alcoholic. But I murder 1 person...

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag?

One's made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with, the other one carries your shopping.

  • 3

    • My girlfriend asked me if we could have anal sex, and I said, "What's that?" She said, "I fuck her ass." I said, "Oh, my uncle calls that shhhhh."

  • 3

    • Brother: "I can hear you using the vibrator every night, I’m right here if you need help."

    Sister: "That’s my f***ing electric toothbrush!"

    Brother: "Oh, well the offer still stands."

    My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, "No, wait! I can change."

    What's the difference between a terrorist base and an elementary school?

    I don't know, I'm just the drone pilot.

    What do you call a redneck sister who runs faster than her brothers?

    A virgin.

  • 3

    • what's the difference between my hand and my blade? my hand isn't sharp.

    A lion, Johnny Depp, and a hockey player from Nashville all have one thing in common.

    They're all Predators!