Worst Jokes Ever

A penis has a sad life.

His hair is a mess.

His family is nuts.

His neighbor is an asshole.

His best friend is a pussy.

And his owner beats him.

What do you call a pregnant slave? Buy one get one free.

I named my dog 5-Miles, so now I tell people, "I walk 5-Miles every day."

Science flies you to the moon, but religion flies you into skyscrapers.

Asian pregnancy test: Stick a Rubik cube into vagina. Wait 30 seconds, if it's solved then there's a little Asian in there.

April Fool's joke: Go to an orphanage and tell them, "Their parents came back."

"Knock knock."

Orphan: "Who's there?"

"Not your parents."

A brother and a sister always got into fights. One day the brother tells the sister, "You're adopted!" The sister yells back, "At least they wanted me!"

What's a suicidal person's favorite game?

Hangman.

If a woman sleeps with 10 men she's a slut, but if a man does it... He's gay, definitely gay.

In Soviet Russia, gay sex gets you arrested.

In America, getting arrested gets you gay sex.

Lmao, idiots don't know how to play Jenga.

How did the dude with epilepsy win the break dancing competition?

He saw flashing lights.

The sexual shout "Yes Daddy" probably originated in Alabama.

What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.

So, I went out to eat the other day, and the waitress came up to me and asked if I wanted a glass of water. I said, "Yes ma'am." She said, "Oh honey, you don't have to call me ma'am, I'm not that old." I said, "Okay, thanks bitch."

What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an ugly girl? The Twin Towers at least got fucked.

I was excited my teacher asked me for sex in exchange for a good grade, but then I realized I was homeschooled.

What song do orphans hate the most? "We are family."

Why did they invent glow-in-the-dark condoms? So gay guys can play Star Wars.