Worst Jokes Ever
Does anyone else here eat pretzels with Nutella? It tastes AMAZINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
"Everyone knows I love kids better than people."
- Joe Biden. (A.K.A. Pedo Peter.)
Why did Hitler die? He got hit by 'ler'.
Say this to someone who is fat that you don't like (make sure he's a virgin):
"You're so fat you can sell shaaade!! That's why you're a virgin and you masturbaaate!!! Yeah, I've see you, touching your 1 centimetre and if you have a gf she's is a cheater!!"
Make sure to say "shaaade" not "shade". And say "maturbaaate" (also try to say a D not a T in maturbaaate) not "masturbate".
One day it was me and my sister in the house. My sister said to me, "Let's order food." I said, "We have no money." My sister said, "It's cool; we're just going to order egg rolls from the Chinese store. I know the delivery boy, and he won't charge us." I said, "Cool."
The delivery boy came with the egg rolls. I took some and ate mine in my room. I went back in the kitchen. I see my sister giving the delivery boy a blow job. I ask, "What are you doing?" My sister replied back to me, "You had your egg rolls; let me enjoy mine." Then the delivery boy said, "Don't no charge."
Why did the chicken cross the towers?
Because he ordered a plane pizza and didn’t get to the other side.
A Chinese wise man once said, "ching chong ling long ting tong," which means, "keep striving in life."
What instrument do people like to listen to while having sex?
A sex-a-phone.
Teacher: What is a cow?
Kid: Meat.
Teacher: Nice. What is a chicken?
Kid: Eggs.
Teacher: What does the big fat pig give you?
Kid: Homework.
What did they find in Paul Walker's glovebox?
His head and shoulders.
What’s the best part about fucking a dead bitch?
You don’t need consent.
You're so bald, United Airlines has asked for permission to land.
Boy: Wanna hear about my dick? Never mind, it's too short.
Girl: Wanna hear about my pussy? Fuck no, you won't get it.
I wrote a song about tortillas...
Actually, it's more of a wrap.
Nessie is dying.
What is the country that is always in a rush? Russia.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Walked into a bar the other day and a group of sailors were being loud and shouting about all the women they have in port that had given them gonorrhea...
Bloody seamen.
What do cannibals think when they see a pregnant woman?
"Kinder Egg surprise."
My dads just like my eggs... runny. 🤣😭🥺