Worst Jokes Ever
Hi š I have some good idea š”. What was the best game Iāve [played]?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
You.
You who?
Don't you get it? You're the joke, dumbass!
What is a rabbit's favorite drink? Hare wine.
Where do rabbits sleep?
In the junkyard outside.
The other day this duck came by the gas station. He asked the cashier, "Do you have any duck food here?"
The cashier said, "Hell naw, I got no damn duck food. This the gas station, not no damn swamp, and I ain't ya mama."
Then the duck asked him two more times, and then the cashier said, "For the last time, no, I don't have any duck food here for you, ok? If you ask me again, I will put you in the oven and deep-fry you like Kentucky Fried Chicken."
Why can't you ever fool an aborted baby?
Because it wasn't born yesterday!
If you ever had your nipple ripped off by a possum, you might be a redneck...
What is an orphan's least favorite TV show?
"Full House."
Why is an orphan good at being naughty?
Because they don't have no one to tell them off.
Why couldn't the teddy bear finish his dessert?
He was stuffed.
The man walks into a bar, reaches into his pocket, and pulls out a tiny piano and a tiny piano player. The piano player starts playing the piano. The guy next to him asks where he got that. The man says there is a genie out on the corner granting wishes.
So the man sitting next to him jumps up and runs outside. He says to the genie, "I want a million bucks." The genie snaps his fingers, and a million ducks appear in the road. The man comes back inside and says, "Hey, that genie is a little hard of hearing." The man says, "Well, did you really think I'd ask for a 12-inch pianist?"
Q. What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common? A. Same middle name! š
What time is it when a rooster sits on a fence? Morning.
What time is it when an elephant sits on a fence? Time to get a new fence.
What time is it when a lawyer sits on the fence? Time for an elephant to sit on the fence.
What is the difference between a tree and "walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school"?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
What is the difference between a human and walk home from school and walk home?
Why canāt an orphan celebrate Fatherās Day and Motherās Day? Because they have no parents.
I love Hebrew John!
What is the difference between the human rights act and a dad?
Why can't orphans play cricket? Because they can't find home.