Worst Jokes Ever

TJ's hairline is so far back, if you travel back in time, you still won't find it.

What’s the best way to get gum out of hair?

Cancer.

Me: Hey, do you want to meet my grandma?

Friend: Yeah, sure.

Me: *pulls out gun*

What do you call it when a man wants food in Panera?

Panera bread serving food.

What hits the ground first, the feather or the emo?

The feather, because the emo is hung in the tree.

I saw a kid crying. I asked him what's wrong, where are your parents? They paused and looked at me funny... GOD I LOVE WORKING AT AN ORPHANAGE.

Yo mama so stupid, she raised you.

One of my friends named Jill had a drug overdose.

She didn’t have any of that drug after that. For the rest of her life, she acted very high. When she died, it was because of natural causes, not the drug. So this proves that a lethal dose is also a life time supply.

I asked my orphan friend to come to my house. He said he was confused because he didn't know what that is.

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

An apple actually gets picked.

Why can’t an orphan be gay?

Because they have no one to call “daddy.”

What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

Why can’t orphans go on a field trip?

Parent signature __________

I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere.

I got the joke from my brother.

How do you fix a cracked pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!

What did momma seal name her twin girls?

Luceal and Sealia.

Someone at my school the other day said that whoever killed Hitler was a hero. Who's going to tell him?

When I was little, I used to think that the people in cartoons were real people...until I turned 7. I realized that it was just people doing voices. Sad, isn't it?

Why do you tell actors to break a leg? Because every play has a cast.

Your momma is so stupid, when someone said it’s chilly outside, she brought a spoon and bowl.