My girlfriend really wants me to get her pregnant so she would have a father figure in her life for once
Have a pregnant lady murders someone does the child get an assist
Wife: "Honey, I'm pregnant."
Husband: "Hi, Pregnant, I'm dad."
Wife: "No, you're not."
What is a similarity between a pregnant 14-year-old and the fetus inside of her?
They both are thinking "Shit! Mom is gonna kill me!"
What does a cannibal call a pregnant person?
A kinder surprise
What's a perfect example of poor management? A prostitute getting pregnant.
I thought my vasectomy would keep my wife from getting pregnant, but apparently it just changes the color of the baby.
A lot of things have changed since I got my girlfriend pregnant.
My name, my address and my phone number.
How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?
He forgot to wrap his Whopper.
What's the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnant woman? You can unscrew the lightbulb.
My town's population never changes. Every time a girl gets pregnant, a guy leaves town.
Why doesn't Barbie ever get pregnant? Because Ken comes in a different box!
How do you get a nun pregnant? -- Dress her up as an alter boy.
What does a pregnant teen and an aborted child have in common They both say “my moms gonna kill me”
Guys my sisters pregnant!
Im finally a dad!
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing diapers!” She replies: “Oh my god! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?” To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
Why buy a pregnant slave over a normal slave ? Buy 1 get 1 free 😂😂😂😂
The person who made it a law to not hurt girls is stupid because we’ve all kicked a pregnant woman before we where even born.
Have u ever noticed When a woman is pregnant aII her friends touch her stomach and say "congrats" but none of them touch the man's penis and say "weII done"
A pregnant wife and her husband were in a hospital as she was in labour, the doctor suggested using a machine that transfers the birth pains from the mother to the father, they agree so the machine is used, 40%, the husband feels nothing, 70% still not felling anything, 100%, nothing. The doctor says it must be broken. When the pair return home, the milkman is dead in the front yard.
