Worst Jokes Ever
Is there a mirror in your pants? Because I see myself in them.
Are your ankles having a party? Because I think your pants should come on down.
Are you a trampoline? Because I want to bounce on you.
What is wrong with the orphan website? It doesn't have a homepage.
Kid walks in the door. "Mommy and Daddy, I'm home." Mommy and Daddy meanwhile in their room moaning. Kid runs to them thinking they're hurt and sees something he definitely shouldn't have.
10 minutes later, [he] kills himself.
Helen Keller walked into a bar...
And into a table, and into a chair.
What do you call emo girls?
Cutting boards.
So many things are going through my head.
How am I not dead yet?
He slips, he falls, he dislocates his balls!
What do lizards and Queen Elizabeth have in common?
They both live long with dry skin.
I saw a kid with no phone. I gave him an iPhone 14.
Except it had no home button.
Suck!
"Hi, this is Pete's pizzeria and abortion clinic, where yesterday's loss is today's sauce."
Why do orphans go to church?
To call someone "father."
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To because he wanted to find home >:D
Me: "The villain has a point, you know."
Everyone else watching the WW2 documentary:
When the kid in the wheelchair scares you... you wheelie scared me.
"Your mum has very small balls. Congrats! I told her, your balls are bigger than your husband's."
Your hairline is so ugly, it's stretching down to Bikini Bottom.
What did the priest say during the christening?
"So anyway, I started blasting!"