Worst Jokes Ever
Yo mama is so stupid, she thought Pillsbury was a fruit.
Good Morning, Sleepy-Head!
Sonic says if you're ever born, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
As I get older, I remember all the people I lost along the way.
Maybe my budding career as a tour guide was not the right choice.
Guys, I'm back...
Here's my joke:
What is blue and red all over?
Blood in the water of a shark attack victim.
Why is it so easy to weigh fish?
They have their own scales.
It's kinda sad seeing you attempt to put your whole vocabulary in one sentence. Oh wait, you only said three words.
What do you call a Mexican who can’t find the bar?
Barlos.
Why do orphans hate the letter FMD? Because F stands for "family," M stands for "mom," and D stands for "dad."
I was in Afghanistan and I had been captured by the Taliban. I was going to get the death penalty.
Suddenly a man came out of nowhere and offered to take the penalty. It was my idolo Penaldo. He missed the penalty. Now I will die. Shame on u Penaldo!
I've recently been treated with Asthma and have been prescribed penicillin. One day I was taking it and a man screaming "SUIII" came into the room and stole it! He thought the penicillin would give him penalties. I couldn't breathe, shame on you Penaldo for ruining my life!
Yo, dad is so stupid, he brought the milk after two years, and he said, "Oh, sorry son. I'm going back to the store. Bye."
Yo mama's so fat, Darth Vader wanted her to be the Death Star!
Yo mama's so fat, she's both in the Atlantic and Pacific ocean.
Why does the singer put a radio in her fridge?
Because she can listen to call music.
Are you feeling down? Because I wanna feel you up.
Little Jonny Bad Ass was sitting on a porch one day, and a preacher was in the house. Little Jonny Bad Ass had to use the bathroom, so he bangs on the door saying, "Mom, I have to use the bathroom!" His mom says wait. So Little Jonny Bad Ass saw a hat on the step. He looks around, pulls his pants down, and shits in the hat.
A few later, the preacher comes out and says, "I see you have my hat!" Little Jonny Bad Ass says, "Yeah, I caught the world's fastest bird!" The preacher says, "Well, let me see him!" Little Jonny Bad Ass says, "No, I don't know." Well, the preacher says, "I'll put my hands by the hat, you lift, and I'll catch him!" Little Jonny Bad Ass lifted the hat and the preacher clapped his hands, and Little Jonny Bad Ass says, "Now see the bird don't shit," and ran.
What is the difference between a detective company and a man with eyes on his butt?
One has a private eye, and the other has eyed privates.
What is a photographer's favorite card game?
SNAP!
Herpes? No, I don't want her. Her pees.