Worst Jokes Ever
The only thing they can see are their chopsticks.
To all my haters, keep sucking. I'm about to cum.
What's Kobe's favorite song?
"Helicopter Helicopter"
Your forehead's so big that I was tryna figure out if that was you or the moon.
Bro, the US keeps bullying the UK because the queen died, and do you know the meme "No Bitches?" Yeah, they put "No Queen" instead. And guess what? The UK replied this time and said, "No Towers?" I was shocked. UK's most devious lick.
Why did the orphan grow up to be a priest?
So he could be called Father Les.
What happens when a depressed kid tries to give a tree a high five?
The tree leaves him hanging :)
My family was watching Home Alone 2, so whenever Kevin was at the top of the Twin Towers, I threw a paper airplane at the T.V.
It took me 9.11 seconds to realize.
Suicide really isn't something to joke about, unless it's hanging yourself.
It's a really quicker way to die, and less blood spilled for your mother to clean up.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not your dad.
Did you know China wanted to send a dog to space?
They didn't because they ate it.
How do you know the hooker killed herself?
She sniffed the line off the dresser you said not to touch.
B: Can you please stop roasting me?
A: At least the "roasting" that I did to you didn't burn you to death.
Why did the ocean wave?
It wanted to say "Hi Tide."
Do you know why the cake doesn't ever fight anyone?
He says, "Take a peace of that!" while entering a fight.
Period blood is like KFC, because it's finger-licking good!
Yo mama so fat when I pushed her into the jacuzzi, it caused a level 8 tsunami.
What do grapes 🍇 love most about family?
Raisin kids!
Little Johnny was living with his grandpa during the summer. Well, grandpa had a beer, and Johnny said, "Grandpa, let me get a sip of that." Grandpa said, "Well, lil Johnny, does your d**k reach your a**?" And lil Johnny said, "Well no sir." And grandpa said, then no, you can't.
Later that day, papaw (grandpa) had a cigar, and Johnny said let me get a hit of that, and papaw asked, "Well, Johnny, does your d**k reach your a**?" And Johnny said no again. Then papaw was shooting his gun, and Johnny asked if he could shoot it, and grandpa asked Johnny if his d**k reached his a**, and Johnny said no.
Well, after supper, Johnny's grandma made Johnny some ice cream (the most amazing bowl of ice cream EVER), and grandpa said, "Johnny, let me get a bit of that ice cream," and Johnny asked papaw, "Well, papaw, does your d**k reach your a**?" And papaw said, "Well, Johnny, as a matter of a fact, it does," and Johnny said, "Good, now go f**k yourself because you ain't getting none of my ice cream!"