Worst Jokes Ever
My friend says, "You should try Oreos with water."
Me: No, because my dad actually came back with the milf.
Why can't gays drive faster than 68 mph?
Because at 69 they blow a rod.
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
Yo mama so ugly, she looks like a green bean with googly eyes.
What do you call the bell at the Asian restaurant?
I'm ta ping it, some ting won.
What is an orphan's favorite movie?
Home Alone.
Bruh, don't be punny.
We see the movie Aladdin, and Abu steals more than Aladdin. I’m surprised that Abu hasn’t gotten killed yet.
What did Stephen Hawking see before he died?
The blue screen of death.
If a physically handicapped gay white male is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall, and if you are a gay white male that is well-endowed that is not physically handicapped, and if you want the physically handicapped gay white male who is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall to suck your dick, what do you do to convince him to suck your dick if you have a hard on and your horny as hell?
Put $25.00 under the handicapped stall before you put your dick under the handicapped stall.
Why can’t orphans be married?
Because they won’t have their parents' blessings.
Yo momma decided to go to KFC until she realized she had to share with her family, so she bought ten buckets and the cashier said, "Here is the receipt." Now yo momma got afraid of how much money she had to spend, despiting on how she spent more than Drake's net worth that he can even lend. She went back home seeing her family looking at her and the KFC, thinking that could be her rent, but the whole family dug into the food. By the second they see the plates empty and seeing the lazy mom steady, she ate so much she wasn't ready until she fell, which caused an earthquake, which made her go to jail, which caused her to be scary.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be Wanted.
Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.
Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.
What is an orphan’s least favorite song? "We are Family."
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? "Family Guy."
What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? "Meet the Parents."
What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.
Next: Inappropriate Jokes
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.
Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Your hairline is so curvy now, Ice Spice has competition!
German XP farms: Train carrying chained guys.
American XP farms: Walking up to a school with a gun.
African XP farms: Cotton field.
When someone calls me ugly, I get sad and hug them.
I know life can be difficult for those with weak vision.
Ask someone to call you a bitch. When they do, tell them, "Bitches do as they are told!"
Do you want to know my motto when I’m bored?
Punch an orphan, who is he going to tell, his mom?
I asked my kid to give me a hand. That motherfucker cried while charging his mechanical arm.
What is an orphan's favorite movie?
"No Way Home."