Worst Jokes Ever
According to all known laws of aviation, a bee should not be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground, but of course, bees fly anyway because bees don't care about what humans think is impossible.
Yellow, Black. Yellow, Black.
What is the octopus's favorite shape?
An octagon.
How do you get 100 babies in the back of a pick up truck? Blender.
How do you get them back out? Straw.
What do you call a funny family of chairs? A sitcom!
What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill?
Taco Bell going out of business.
What will you call Burj Khalifa after 100 years?
"Bujurg" Khalifa. (Just a joke)
My mother caught me jerking off and she told me to leave it out. I didn't know what she was doing but she grabbed my cock and started sucking. Then I found out on porn she was doing deep throat.
A couple of weeks later my dad caught me jerking off, I thought he would deep throat, but he just walked up to me and slapped my boner. I cried for 5 hours. Luckily my mum gave me a sloppy joe afterwards.
What's the difference between a baby and a mansion?
I've never seen the inside of a mansion.
Why do people watch hentai?
Because they are as fake as pornstars are.
Knock knock...
Who's there?
Not Stephen Hawking.
In my house, good sex sounds like seals slapping each other.
I remember Grandpa's last words, "Oh, shit! It's in drive!"
Q: What did the skeleton say when he proposed to his girlfriend?
A: Will you marrow me?
A little boy was given a bicycle and a soccer ball for his birthday, but why was the little boy unhappy?
Because the little boy had no legs.
How many feminazis does it take to change a light bulb?
None, because they can't change anything.
I got my little girl a hand sewing kit for her birthday and she cried. I didn't understand why until I realized that she had no hands to sew with.
What was the last thing that crossed Princess Diana's mind?
The steering wheel.
What did Hitler get for his 6th birthday?
A Kewpie burger and an Easy-Bake Oven.
Asian pregnancy test:
Stick a Rubix cube into pussy.
Wait 30 seconds, if it's solved then there's a little Asian in there.
I don't have much motivation for things, that's why I haven't yet killed myself, hehe.