Worst Jokes Ever
I'd tell you a joke about pizza, but it's too cheesy.
My new leaf blower doesn't work. It sucks.
Children are like farts.
You can only tolerate your own.
Who's a pineapple? I'm a pineapple... Yass.
Teacher and kid.
Kid: Hey, teacher.
Teacher: Yes?
Kid: Would you punish me for something I didn't do?
Teacher: Of course not.
Kid: Well, I didn't do my homework!
A llama kicked me out of my house. Alpaca my bags.
Person 1: Hi, I am Tom, and you?
Person 2: Andrew?
How did the British lose the War of 1812?
They were out-Britshed.
What's the difference between a baby and an onion?
I cry when I chop up an onion.
What is Thanos's favorite video game?
Pokémon Snap.
What does a cow use in school? A cowculator.
My girlfriend's dog died, so to cheer her up I went out and got her an identical one.
She went mad, "What am I going to do with two dead dogs?"
Video games don't make people violent, lag does.
I have been reading this book about zero gravity. I can’t seem to put it down.
Why is a tomato red?
Because it saw the ranch dressing!
Mushroom?
Want to hear a joke about construction? I'm still working on it.
Creeper?
What’s the difference between cancer and my brother?
My brother didn’t beat cancer.
Why is the white guy in prison scarier than a black guy in prison?
Because the white guy actually did it.
Why are gay guys so rude?
Because they’re fucking assholes.