Worst Jokes Ever
I want to write some jokes about unemployed people, but none of them works.
John and Chloe are in school arguing about who has the more heroic grandfather.
Chloe says, "My grandfather killed 50 Nazis, he's so heroic!"
John says, "So what? My grandfather KILLED Hitler!"
What is white with red all over?...
JFK.
How is a child molester and Harambe the same? They both get shot for touching little kids.
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys. It's true.
I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.
What's the difference between a wizard who raises the undead and a sexy vampire?
One is a necromancer and the other is a neck romancer.
"Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella.
What’s the only advantage of being an orphan?
Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.
My fish died, and I didn't do anything. I just took my fish for a walk.
Why did Michael Jackson dangle a baby over a balcony?
He wanted to clean out the blanket.
Why do orphans kill people so they can finally be wanted?
Become an anti-furry for free KFC and dead orphans in your basement.
What do rocks and girls have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
Why do orphans always have water with their cereal?
Their dad never came back with the milk!
Yo mama is so ugly that your dad has to be drunk to bring her home.
Your teeth are so yellow they slow down traffic.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett? Six hours.
I asked the gym instructor,
"Can you teach me to do the splits?"
"How flexible are you?" he asked.
"Well, I can't make it on Fridays."
What goes in dry and comes out wet and has white stuff at the end?
Treat me like a joke, and I will leave you like it's funny.