Worst Jokes Ever
Did you guys see on the news where they arrested that pervert at the Michaels Crafts store?
He was running around completely naked and had sprinkled glitter all over his testicles. I guess it was pretty nuts.
Mooning is very astrological!
People say I should be proud of my autism, but truth be told, I'm only in it for the help in class.
Why shouldn’t you pick on a midget with learning difficulties?
... Because it’s not big and it’s not clever.
What has two legs and is red all over?
Half a cat.
What's the difference between baby Jesus and the baby I keep in my basement?
Baby Jesus died a virgin.
Did Jesus die a virgin?
Of course not! He got nailed before he died.
What is the hardest part of twerking?
Being black.
9/11... 911... COINCIDENCE I THINK NOT!
A pedophile is playing poker with 8 seven-year-olds.
The pedophile has a pair of 7's and three 4's in the river. He smiles and says, "Yay, I got me a full house!"
😥This is offensive, sorry: What did the king say to his royal steed? "You gonna start the dishwasher or what?"
Commander: "Fire a warning shot."
Soldier: "Sir, this is a M32 grenade launcher."
Commander: "Potato, potato, just fire."
Soldier: *fires M32 grenade launcher near a pre-school*
Commander: "They're trying to run, TAKE THEM DOWN!"
What do you call a short black person?
By their name, you racist!
What do you call a pig with no legs?
A groundhog.
How do you know cat's don't always land on their feet?
Mufasa.
What is a cow's favorite drink?
Mountain Moo!
Where do Down syndrome kids go shopping downtown?
You know those paper families you cut out?
Well, I put one of those in an orphanage.
What is blue but smells like red paint?
Blue paint.
What did Tennessee do?
The same thing Arkansas did.