Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between 911 and a Mexican gardener?
One of them is an outside job.
My dad died in 9/11.
He was the best pilot I ever knew.
Two Indians talk over a long distance using smoke signals.
In the middle of the conversation, a nuclear bomb explodes behind one of them, and a huge cloud of smoke rises silently into the sky.
The other Indian signals with smoke: "Not so loud!"
my therapist told me that time heals wounds i stabbed him now we wait
Used to laugh at Michael Jackson for wearing gloves and a mask...
Yet here I am, stuck at home in this COVID-19 "Thriller," beating it...
If I was any more inbred, I'd be a sandwich.
Why did Michael Jackson allow little boys to sleep in his house? Because he's bad.
Whatβs the difference between Jeffrey Dahmer and a priest?
They both like lil' boys.
What does Michael Jackson and Chef from South Park have in common?
They both say "Hello children!"
What's the quickest way to get money besides winning the lottery?
Leaving your son with Michael Jackson.
What do Michael Jackson and Linus have in common? They both carry a little blanket.
What was Michael Jackson's favorite word to say to parents and tabloids? "Leave me alone."
What did Michael Jackson say before he died, as far as his childhood? "This is it."
Who did Michael Jackson want to be like? The man in the mirror.
Why didn't Michael Jackson date 25 year olds?
Because there were only 20 of them.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite drink? Tea-hee-hee!
Why does Michael Jackson like 44-year-olds? There's 4 of them.
Oh, Lois, that was more scary than Michael Jackson without pants in front of a kid!
Seeing one of her students making faces at others in the playground, Mrs. Matthews stopped to gently reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the teacher said, "When I was a child, I was told if I made ugly faces I would stay like that."
The student looked up and replied, "Well, you canβt say you werenβt warned, Mrs. Matthews!"
What do you call a cow in the snow?
Chilli Beef.