Worst Jokes Ever
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone chucked a brick at her.
Why did Sally throw a clock out the window? She had brain damage from the brick.
There was a race between Lettuce, a faucet, and Ketchup. The lettuce was a-head, the faucet was still running, and the ketchup was trying to ketchup.
A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.
I just finished my fourth round of baby back ribs. For some reason, everyone else at the abortion center is staring at me.
Why did Steven Hawking have no friends?
He couldn’t stand anyone...
Why the f was my shooting joke removed? It was funny, and this is obviously a website for morbid humor. WTF, I mean, worstjokesever.com. Come on...
Dark humor is just like food, not everybody gets it.
I like my women like I like my wine: 12 years in a basement.
What do you call a blonde in a freezer?
Her parents called her Cindy, so we should probably continue calling her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
Mom said dad had the best pullout game... now I'm an uncle.
When do astronauts eat lunch?
At launch time.
A millionaire LOVES alligators and filled his pool full of alligators. One night he has a party and says, "Whoever can swim from one end to the other of the alligator infested pool unharmed will get a prize, my daughter or a million dollars." Some people line up but they are hesitant. One man gets in the water, swims from one end to the other unharmed, and went to the millionaire. The millionaire says, "Wow, I can't believe you did it! So what's your prize?" The guy says, "I don't care about the million dollars or your daughter, I just want to know who the b@$*ard was that pushed me in the pool!"
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it!
What's Gru's favorite Beyoncé lyric? "Who run the world... Gorls."
I once had a cat that reminded me of Doug Ford.
Fat, mean, and probably inbred.
What did scientists prove when they saw a skeleton on the moon?
The cow didn’t make it.
Wanna know what is offensive? I don't know, ask feminist (sans undertale).
Two cannibals have just captured a man and are about to eat him, so they cook him and lay him on a table. The first cannibal says, "You start at the bottom, I start at the top," so they both chow down.
About half an hour later, the second cannibal says, "I'm having a ball!" Then the first cannibal says, "Then you're eating too fast!"
Your spelling is more morbid than any of these jokes.
My sisters ask me, "Are you really a virgin?" I say, "That's nun of your business!"