Worst Jokes Ever
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?
Hit your wife harder.
What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.
What do Logan Paul, KSI, and the Japanese suicide victim have in common?
Tying.
How do you make a pink Smurf?
You peel the skin off.
So, Satan is in the delivery room having a child.
Soon, a feathered creature comes out. "Doctor," says Satan, "What is it?"
The doctor sighs. "Well, it's not a boy, and it's not a girl."
Satan looks frustrated. "THEN WHAT IS IT?!?!?"
The doctor looks up. "It's a goose."
What do you call a blonde in the freezer?
Her parents named her Cindy, so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
Why did the lion always lose at poker?
He was playing with a bunch of cheetahs.
Why did Bob fall off the swing while playing? Because he had no arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there?
Not Bob.
Q: How do you make a pool table laugh?
A: Tickle its balls.
Why was the boy crying?
He had a frog stapled to his face.
My doctor said, "You have 1 year to live."
I said, "You wanna bet?"
Bam, a gunshot!
Is it bad to hit an orphan?
It's not like they'll tell their parents.
A miscarriage always brings the child out in me.
Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt, quack!
John: Hi, boss, it is raining heavily today, so I will not be coming.
Boss: You stated in your job application that swimming was your hobby, so see you at 11 AM.
Bin Laden promised 76 virgins to Al-Qaeda.
Instead, there was one 76-year-old virgin.
What do you call a woman with three boobs? Tres leches.
My old platoon sergeant always told me the hardest thing when walking through a field of dead babies was... his cock.
Chuck Norris doesn't get sun burns. The sun knows better.
What do cigarettes and hamsters have in common?
They can both be dangerous when you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.