Worst Jokes Ever
Why was the chef embarrassed?
He saw the salad dressing.
What was the last thing that went through Princess Diana's mind?
The steering wheel.
If somebody cuts their leg off and hits you with it, would they be kicking or hitting you?
You should never try Afghan weed because people in Afghanistan get stoned to death.
I always hated being born a Catholic as a kid. The way you have to keep kneeling down, bending over, and standing up all within a few minutes of each other while at church. I was always thinking, “For God’s sake, just pick a position and fuck me!”
My girlfriend and I played Russian Roulette once.
We had sex afterwards even though she lost.
Your momma is so skinny, she hula hoops with a Cheerio!
What do you tell a dead metal fan?
Rust in peace.
Jack and Jill went up the Jill so Jack could lick Jill's fanny, but Jack had a shock with a mouthful of cock because was actually a tranny.
What's worse than 1000 dead babies hanging off a tree?
1 dead baby hanging off 1000 trees.
The fat kid asked the teacher, "Is Godzilla real?" The teacher said, "They're standing right in front of me."
One day a man was fixing a car, and he accidentally got brake oil in his mouth. He was about to spit it out, but then he thought, "Hmm, this tastes pretty good!" So he would keep drinking brake oil. But his friends were getting worried about him, and they were like, "Dude, this can't be healthy." But he said, "Don't worry. I can STOP anytime."
Is sex a joke? Because I don't get it.
Why do you never play a game of cards in the jungle? Because there are cheetahs!
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef.
Mexican runs into a wall. He loses hope.
How do you get a clown to stop smiling?
You shoot him in the face.
How do you make a dead baby float?
1 cup rootbeer 2 scoops dead baby.
How would you best describe prostate cancer?
Well, it is somewhere between a dick and an asshole!
Why do Down's kids blend in in geometry?
Their foreheads are angled.