Worst Jokes Ever
Crucifixion was the first T-pose.
How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
5
4 to turn the table, and 1 to hold the bulb.
How did I escape from Iraq, Iran?
Why are Japanese always so skinny?
Cause last time there was a fat man, an entire city disappeared.
Me running after slapping the emo kid's wrist and saying, "I like ya cut g."
Q: Why did the two gate-builders start fighting?
A: Because they were fencing.
What do chairs spend on the most?
Chair-ity.
I bought a wooden whistle. But it wooden whistle. So I bought a steel whistle. But it steel wooden whistle. So I bought a lead whistle. But it steel wooden lead me whistle. So I bought an iron whistle. But ironically it steel wooden lead me whistle.
My friend’s mother was never a font of sympathy, but always the one to see beyond the darkness.
Upon learning about her daughter’s cancer diagnosis she said, “Well honey, at least you’ll lose some weight!”
The American salute starts with your hand facing flat towards the ground on your head.
The British salute starts with your hand against your head just like the American salute.
The French salute starts with your hands in the air.
The Saudi salute starts with you being bent over with a camel tongue in your ass.
The other day I took my Grandma to one of those fish spas where the little fish eat your dead skin.
It was way cheaper than having her buried in the cemetery.
Rock, paper, lesbians.
I wanna die.
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite place to eat?
A: Schools because there is a wide variety of choices.
Black holes and horny black women have 1 thing in common, they suck everything in sight.
What do you call a Roman with hair in his teeth?
A "glad-he-ate-her".
My syndrome may be down, but my hopes are always up.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A lick-a-lot-of-puss!
Where do mathematicians go to die?
The symmetry.
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
Nobody nose.