Worst Jokes Ever
How do you stop a baby from drowning? pt. 2
-Harpoon it.
Two skeleton brothers are talking.
1st bro: "Hey, get up! You and do some exercise! You are so heavy, you weigh a ton!"
2nd bro: "A skele-TON :)"
It's not rape if she doesn't say no.
Two options: - Chloroform. - Duct Tape.
Why don't oysters share their pearls?
Because they're shellfish!
Damn, bitch, you got a big ass for a head!
What's an African's favorite sport to play, but they can't? Water polo.
When someone has an imaginary friend, you call them weird and crazy.
But when a group of people have an imaginary friend, you call it religion. :)
An obese, depressed mother is trying to tie a noose, but can't reach it, so she calls her son for help.
*A few minutes later*
son: There.
mother: Where did you learn to tie such a good noose?
son: Dad showed me before he died.
mother: DAMN HIM TO HE- *slips and the noose chokes her to death*
A man goes to the library to find the best book about committing suicide. So when he asks the librarian, "What's the best book on committing suicide?" The librarian said, "Oh, fuck off...you won't bring it back anyway."
Yo mama so fat, Thanos had to snap twice.
What do you call a Muslim who owns 6 goats? -- A pimp.
James: I have a joke. Sex!
Ronny: I don't get it.
James: Exactly.
How do you blow up an Indian person?
You press the red button.
How did the octopus go to the war?
Well armed.
If you're ever bored, just rape an orphan! What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Why did Billy not like the soccer ball he got for Christmas?
He has no legs...
Why did Paul Walker cross the road?
He wasn't wearing a seatbelt.
Yo mama so fat that when she sits down, the earth falls out of the Solar System.
How does the bunny keep his fur neat?
With a hare brush.
Why did Stephen Hawking die? He ran out of data.