Worst Jokes Ever
The next sentence is telling the truth. The previous sentence is telling a lie.
Why wasn’t the moon hungry?
Because it was full!
The shovel is a ground breaking invention.
*Slaps and laughs*
What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves?
Christopher Walken.
What bird doesn’t need a comb?
Bald eagles.
If at first you don't succeed,
Maybe Russian Roulette isn't for you.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you ♥️.
At least Africans don't have to worry about food critics.
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Because she had no arms."
"Why couldn’t she get up off the ground?" "Because she had no friends."
"Knock knock." "Who’s there?" "Not Susie, she’s still on the ground."
"Where did Susie go when the bomb went off?" "Everywhere."
"Why couldn’t Susie scratch her leg?" "Because it was in a different body bag."
"Why did Susie drop her ice cream?" "She was hit by a bus."
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Someone threw a refrigerator at her."
Man, my Muslim friend's the bomb!
A kid milks a cow and goes to school and tells his friends, "I milked a cow, and it took awhile for it to warm up." His brother came over and said, "We don't have cows, we have bulls."
What did the North tower say to the south tower? "Sorry, can't talk, got to catch a plane."
My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack.
I always hit on 16, then get busted.
I was playing chess with my friend and he said, "Let’s make this interesting."
So we stopped playing chess.
Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale?
They already lost two towers.
Son: Can I go to my friend's mum? Mum: No! Son: Dad was right, I am a son of a bitch! Mum: Bad news, but you're adopted!!
Is it just me, or do you kids have imaginations?
What do you call a depressed tree?
A wood cutter.
Holy shit there's so many yo mama jokes. Here's mine: Yo mama so skinny she used a cheerio as a hula hoop.
Yo mama so fat that she made a plane unstable and crashed it into the Twin Towers.
Yo mama so old that she has Jesus's autograph.
Yo mama so ugly that not even makeup can save her.
Yo mama so dumb that she thought Rocket League was a competition between kids in wheelchairs.
Your forehead is so big, your entire face is on your chin.