Worst Jokes Ever
Stormtrooper: What should we do about the failed plan?
Palpatine: Screw it.
what happens when you accidentally taught your child to call every man daddy?
you find the real one.
Wanna hear a joke?
Feminism.
Suicidal ideation is like wanting to slaughter someone but knowing/feeling that you can't. It's also, in a way, kind of like seeing a really hot chick that you wish you could F, but you again for whatever reason you either feel you can't or you just can't.
What do bees do when they get married?
They go on a honeymoon.
What sucks but doesn't suck?
Vacuums!
I just watched a documentary about beavers. It was the best dam show I've ever seen.
What do you call an old black person? Farming antique.
Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale?
They already lost two towers.
Your hairline's so messed up that even Martin Luther King Jr. couldn't have a dream about it.
Why did Hitler kill himself?
He didn’t want to pay the gas bill.
I bought my cousin a trampoline, she started crying. She was in a wheelchair.
Nice! Angry Birds really has improved.
What’s the worst song to play in front of a vegetable? “James Brown - Get on Up”
What’s the worst song to play in front of a handicapped kid? “Van Halen - Jump”
What's the worst song to play in front of a black man in Minneapolis? “I Can't Breathe - Juice Wrld”
What is the most popular game at the orphanage?
Need For Speed: Most Wanted.
Once i was walking along the beach and there was a girl with no arms or legs there, i walked by and she said excuse me, will you touch me ive never been touched before, i was like okay so i touched her, i kept on walking along and there was the same girl, she said sir will you kiss me, i went alright so i went up and kissed her, i thought that was weird but anyway i kept walking along and there she was again, she said sir will you fuck me? I went okay so i picked her up and threw her in the ocean and went YOUR FUCKED NOW
POV: Someone stole Michael Jackson's baby: "He he stole my bab(y), he he."
Why did Helen Keller sign the n-word?
She thought she was black.
Your forehead is so big, your entire face is on your chin.
Why don't catholic kids lose their virginity in their 20's?
Because they lost it to a priest when they were 5