Worst Jokes Ever
People say that biting off your finger would be as easy as biting a carrot if your brain didn't try to stop you. How the f do people know that and how many people's fingers did they bite off before coming to that conclusion?
Why do you call a priest a father? Because calling them daddy would be too sus.
If the minions serve whoever is the biggest bad, then who did they serve 1930-1945?
If you really think about it, every market in Africa is a black market.
If all your clothes were stolen, what would you go home in?
The dark.
Any joke that I make about 9/11 has a tendency to crash and burn.
Two wind turbines were standing on a hill.
One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The other one says, "I'm a big metal fan."
What are the two hottest cities in the world? Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
Your mom is so slow, it took her 9 months to make a joke.
How do you spell ihop?
Then spell ihop and say "ness".
What happens when Rick Astley is getting an erection whilst singing "Never Gonna Give You Up"?
You get PRICKrolled.
When the police caught him stealing the batteries, he got immediately charged!
What do you call a spice with a PHD?
Dr. Pepper
What is a cup called when they show a ton of emotions?
Answer: Expresso! (KILL MEH)
Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the road?
Because he got stuck in a crack.
Public speaking is a more popular fear than snakes, and you don't see anyone walking in Australia and shout, "Look out! A podium!"
What do you do during a shooting? Why, join in, of course...
Once my friend was saying something dumb, and I was like, "I Campbell-eve you just said that."
Knock knock. Who's there? A boy. A boy who? A boy who can't reach the doorbell knocking at your door.
Q. What do you give a sick lemon?
A. Lemon-aid.