Worst Jokes Ever
What do furries and fast food lovers have in common? They both love hot dogs.
Son: Can I go to my friend's mum? Mum: No! Son: Dad was right, I am a son of a bitch! Mum: Bad news, but you're adopted!!
Your hairline's so messed up that even Martin Luther King Jr. couldn't have a dream about it.
How do you get 500 dead babies into a car?
A blender.
How do you get 500 dead babies out of a car?
A straw.
Daughter: "I know this is weird, but I feel like someone is watching me when I am sleeping."
Father: "Sorry."
Me and my brother were called the twin towers. My brother lived up to his title after the plane crash.
It was the year 1912. I was in the SS Titanic, and I woke from a dream to think, "I've heard of wet dreams, but is that WATER?"
A sex addict man meets a rich man around Christmas.
The sex addict asks the rich man, "What are you getting your wife this Christmas?" The rich man replies, "Diamond earrings and a Mercedes." The sex addict asks, "Why are you getting her two gifts?" The rich man says, "Well, if she doesn't like the earrings then she can drive to the store and exchange them."
The sex addict nods. Then the rich man asks him, "So what are you getting your wife this year?" The sex addict thinks about it for a second and replies, "A gold necklace and a dildo."
The rich man asks, "Why those two things?" The sex addict astutely responds, "This way, if she doesn't like the jewelry she can go f... herself."
Depression, I got it.
A girlfriend, don't got it.
A life, don't got it.
Help, got it.
Friends, don't got it.
Family, I got it.
Best of all, depression, I got it!!!!!!
Trump says to Obama, "You know it’s the White House, not the black house, right?" And Obama says, "Yeah, but it isn’t the orange house either."
Roses are red, violets are blue, Fortnite is dead and so are you.
Jokes about menstruation are not funny. Period.
What's the best part of having sex on a golf course?
The hole experience.
What is easier to pick up the heavier it gets?
Women.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To die.
Hot women with big boobs work at Hooters, but where does a handicap woman work?
IHOP.
What did the leper say to the prostitute?
You can keep the tip.
What does DNA stand for?
National Dyslexic Association.
Want to hear a joke about milk? No, it's too cheesy.
Where do people with no legs go to have fun?
Legnoland.