Worst Jokes Ever
Why are there no Olympics in Mexico?
Because everyone from Mexico that can run, jump, and swim is already over the border.
Why do tigers have stripes? They don't want to be spotted.
My dad posted a picture of his condom challenge fail to his social media - it was a picture of me.
What has two wings and a halo?
A Chinese telephone. Wing-wing Halo?
What did the kid with leukemia watch last night? Finding Chemo.
So there's this uncle of female and male twins, and his sister, the mother of the twins, is stuck trying to think of a name for the children. The uncle says, "I've got an idea!", and the mother gets excited, thinking this could be it. She says, "What should their names be?"
The uncle replies, "Well for your daughter, Denise." "That's a nice name," comments the mother, "but what about my son?" The uncle simply replies, "Denephew".
Grammar: It's the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit.
What is the similarity between a joke and food?
Some people just don't get them!
What is a cow's favorite move? -- The sound of moooosic.
There's four people on a roof: a Mexican, an Asian, a black guy, and a white guy. The Mexican walks over to the ledge and says, "This is for my people," and jumps off. The Asian also walks over to the ledge and says, "This is for my people," and jumps off. Then, the black guy walks over to the edge and says, "This is for my people," and pushes the white guy off.
I started a company selling land mines that look like prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof.
Trump is going too far.
He deported a printer because it didn't have papers.
Why do people want emo grass? Because it'll cut itself.
Why did Sally fall out of the swing?
She had no arms.
Why couldn’t she get up?
Because she had no friends.
What do you call a sex offender attending church? A priest.
I decided to visit Saudi Arabia with my girlfriend.
She and I learned they celebrate Pride month by throwing stones.
If you wanna really know how to get under my skin, give me a razor and maybe we'll talk ;)
Friend: Did your tattoos hurt?
Me: Nah, not really.
Friend: What did they feel like?
Me: 7th grade.
Friend: 😶😶😨😰😰😰😨
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome who plays basketball?
Dribble.
If I wanted to commit suicide, I would climb up to your ego, and then jump down to your IQ.