Worst Jokes Ever
Them: You want some Lucky Harms?
Me: What are Lucky Harms?
Them: They're Lucky Charms, but instead of being magically delicious, they're magically malicious.
Yo mama so poor, she can't even pay attention.
What does an apple and a lawyer have in common?
They both look good hanging from a tree.
A retard won a break-dancing competition. All he did was go to get a drink.
How many dead prostitutes does it take to change a light bulb? Obviously not 8, because it's still dark in my basement.
Stephen Hawking just died. Have they tried rebooting him to factory settings?
A skeleton goes sky diving. Doesn't come back in one piece.
Yo mamma so stupid when a robber stole her TV, she ran after him saying, "You forgot the remote!"
The more emos there are, the less emos there are.
I love murder shows... wish me luck cause I'm kinda hoping to be on one one day.
If it's true what they say and I quote, "God never gives you more than you can handle," then you should pray to those who didn't, that God gave them a body strong enough to survive the attempt.
What's the difference between Mexicans and stoners? Stoners actually have papers.
I asked my midget neighbor if he wanted a lift. He told me to "Fuck off!!!" I thought, what a cheeky cunt and zipped my backpack up and walked away.
Guy spills milk on me. I say, "It's okay, we all make mistakes sometimes, but apparently your mom made a big one."
What is the difference between an old chest and a kid? One doesn't cry when you drop it in the basement.
He's not really dead, his update failed.
Why are we depressed? Is it because of that bully in your school, or because you have acne? How about when you listen to your sad song playlist? Maybe it's because you have no friends? Or is it the fact your anime girlfriend is fake? T^T
Why is it that when Donald Trump and Melania make love, she is always on top?
Donald Trump can only F@#k up.
What is a skeleton's favorite instrument?
A trom-bone 😂
I never wanted to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.
But when I got home, all the signs were there.