Worst Jokes Ever
What do Priests and School shooters have in common?
They both blast little kids in the face.
Everybody is mad because that guy from Alberta punched a girl in a wheelchair.
I think he was upset because he found out his sister was cheating on him.
I once dated a math teacher. It turned out she was nothing but problems.
What is a monkey’s 🐒 favorite dance move?
The banana 🍌 split.
What did the sweet potato say to the potato when he was told to hurry?
I yam.
Knock knock?
Who's there?
Not Sally, she doesn’t have any arms.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? She doesn’t have any arms.
Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus.
What’s the difference between an epileptic corn shucker and a prostitute with diarrhea?
The epileptic corn shucker “shucks between fits”...
What do kids play when they can't play with a phone?
Bored games.
Why were the cherries 🍒 crying?
Because their parents were in a jam.
What has two legs but can’t walk? Pants 👖
How do rapists justify murdering a young innocent human being?
Same way as pro-aborts, by saying "My body, my choice!"
Hi there! My name is Michael Grover, and I am an explorer. Ever since I’ve been little, I’ve loved searching for new things. As a baby, my parents kept finding me in nooks and crannies around the house. “On the search,” as they would say.
By the age of 5, I had been to every continent on the planet, barring Antarctica. For my 12th birthday, my parents got me diving lessons, and by the time I was 13, I could scuba dive to a depth of 40 meters, as well as go cave diving.
I got a pilot’s license by the age of 17, and I learned to sail just before my 18th birthday. Instead of going to university, I decided to travel around South America, exploring its rich jungles and beautiful landscapes.
During my trip, I met my now wife who was also an explorer. For our honeymoon, we sailed around the Caribbean, and we discovered 3 new islands which we named after the cats that I had growing up.
Over the course of my life, I have come across great treasures and wondrous experiences. But in all my life, and in all my travels, I’m afraid I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said.
What do Hitler and Trump have in common? They both do hand gestures.
My doctor called me a "psychopath." How dare he?!? He'll pay for this!
What's worse than sticking 12 raw oysters up your grandma's pussy and sucking them out?
Sticking 12 raw oysters up there and sucking out 13.
Technoblade can defeat every Minecraft player, but he still can’t defeat cancer!
You'd think the Catholic Church would be in favor of condoms... less DNA evidence.
What’s the difference between an emo kid and a dead pig?
Suicide squad.
I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off!
Did you hear about the dyslexic pimp?
He bought a warehouse.