Worst Jokes Ever
My girlfriend said to me, "Dear, I think you have hit an animal, there's blood and dents all over the bonnet."
I said, "No, love, I'm not waiting for a Black Lives Matter rally."
I was absolutely fuming when I found out my mate was rifling through my mum's knicker drawer.
No one goes in there without my permission!
The "w" in Africa is for water.
People are so f***ed up. I belated "Frickin' BTW!"
His name is "Daddy!" HELP!
The toothbrush says, "I have the worst job in the whole world."
The toilet paper behind him says, "Yeah, right."
Which type of nut goes to outer space?
An astro-nut.
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?
'Cause it was stuck in the crack... *buttcrack*
I hope death is a woman. That way, she'll never come for me.
A blind man walked into a fish market and said... "Hello, ladies!"
Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the gay man's house?
Knock knock, it's the gay man. There's a chicken at my house.
My brother thinks he's cool when he just SMELLS.
You're so fat, you don't need internet because you're already worldwide.
What is an orphan's first phone?
An iPhone 12. Wanna know why?
It has no home button :D
Do you know why orphans can't play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Roses are red, violets are purple, lay in my bed so I can suck your nurple.
Yo mama so fat, when she jumped in the pool, the water jumped out!
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get to his owner.
A basketball player walks into a strip club:
"Hi, I heard I could bounce some balls here?"
Thing 1: What's the difference between nuts and almonds?
Thing 2: I don't know, what?
Thing 1: One gets hard faster.