Worst Jokes Ever
What's green and sticky?
... A stick.
If a master fisherman had a caddie, what would be the caddie's job title?
A master baiter.
How do people with hydrocephalus wear standard-size helmets?
An alligator is in a class, turns out he likes teaching!
Your head so big you can wash a big TV on it!
My sister said to kill myself, so now I’m in the hospital hoping to die.
What animal is best at hitting baseballs?
A bat.
Why can you trust a donut? It tells the hole truth!
What animal is always at a baseball game? A bat.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Hatch.
Hatch who?
Bless you!
What time is it when you get home and you can walk walk home and walk walk?
Say Fentanyl 3 times in the mirror and you'll see Derek Chauvin kneeling on George Floyd's neck.
Why do they call it oven, when you of in the cold food of out hot eat the food?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they have no home to run to.
Fritz Cheng was asked to write three articles on the subject. He went to his grandmother and advised her: "Question: Kill people! I am sorry, Mr. Fritz, I am looking for his brother—what do you suggest?"
Brother: "I'm Superman. I am Superman!"
Fritz remembers entering the room. That's Alfredo's question in front of the TV: "Do you have any advice?"
Fritz tells a story from his school days. "Remember our words?" said Professor Fleck. "An artist? Is that true? Frison, who are you?"
"I am Superman. I'm Superman," he said. "I hope to meet the president."
What’s the difference between toilet paper and a curtain?
So, it was you....
Question: Why was "6" scared?
Answer: Because "7" ate "9"!
What would you do if you were killed?
Wanna hear a joke?
Look in the mirror; I'm sure you'll find one there :')
What goes up but never comes down?