Worst Jokes Ever
I walked up to a man, and he said, "How's the weather up there?" and then I pushed him into the street to get hit by a bus.
"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.
I may not be as "rich" as Donald Trump, but at least I am still allowed to go on holiday to Bali, Niagara Falls, Hong Kong, and the Pyramids of Giza.
Orange Jesus can't travel to these places because these places cannot grant entry to felons.
...ah, who am I kidding? It's likely that Trump is going to prison, anyway.
What did the dentist say when he looks into a patient's mouth?
"I C D K"
You know what I see?
DICK
So, I was in the church the other day, raping this woman, when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!' I said, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'
What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just killed?
Isaac Newton died a virgin!😎
Who is more loyal: a dog or a wife?
Well, lock them both in your trunk for two hours and drive around and see which one is happy to see you.
So, there was this cop on the top bunk of a bunk bed.
Another cop walks in and sits on the bottom bunk and the cop on the top bunk bed said, "You're under a-rest."
What do kidnappers and Mickey Mouse have in common? They say, "Come inside, it’s fun inside."
One day I came to my mom and said, "MOM!!! I can make a butterfly!"
Mom: "No you can't..."
Me: *throws butter out the window* Me: "Look I made a butterfly!"
lol this isn't funny but I hope you liked it.
Friend: I broke up with Sara.
Me: I know, she came over and I screwed her hard.
Friend: How did her pussy feel?
Me: After about 2 inches, it felt brand new.
Friend: What do you— HOLD UP. WHAT TF IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN!?!
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because dad never came back with the milk.
I would make a rape joke, but I'd have to force it down your throat.
What do you call a dead baby?
Spawn killed.
I saw a kid crying and I asked him where his parents were...
Man, I love working at an orphanage.
I asked an emo girl if she gets jealous when her phone dies.
What's the best comeback for a person calling you an orphan?
Kill their parents.
How does a Muslim close a door? He islams it.
How many kids does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them. 😂😂😂😂
If this post gets 200 likes or comments, I will show up in a MrBeast video.