Worst Jokes Ever
Someone in my class yelled "Jenga!" while watching a documentary about the Twin Towers.
A guy wakes up one morning and is walking down the road, and he smells fish, and he says, "Good morning, ladies!"
When I saw a kid fall with no legs, I said, "Just walk it off!"
I punched my mom for no freaking reason.
To start off this Christmas season, I'ma make a list of what I want, then I'ma make plans with my family, then to start off my decorations, I'ma start with the first ornament and hang myself.
Why can't religion and science agree?
Because science creates skyscrapers, and religion combines with skyscrapers.
Q: What's the difference between an apple tree and an orphan?
A: Apples get picked! 😱
Why does Joe Biden call women muffins?
'Cause muffins backwards is sniffum.
What do you call a monkey in a minefield?
A baboom.
The double slit experiment shows light particles are a wave that assemble in your presence. And you didn't even have to say a word!
What do clams do on their birthday? They shell-brate, but they eat all the cake for themselves because they’re shellfish!
Why were the Twin Towers angry?
Because they ordered pepperoni pizza, and all they got was plane.
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Who."
"Who who?"
"Why are you who-ing like an owl?"
Why do orphans make the best girlfriends?
Because they don't need permission from their parents.
What is Jesus’s Favorite Exercise?
CrossFit.
What's the best finger for fingering A minor?
"Do you know the difference between wallpaper and toilet paper?" Replies, "No." "Gross!"
Do you know what the equivalent to hell is these days?
1. Listening to your teacher.
2. Not having your phone/game/TV.
3. Not having nicotine.
How do emo bands prepare for their shows?
They self-harmonize.
I asked my class what comes before 47. Everyone said 46, except for the quiet kid who said, "AK."