Worst Jokes Ever
Some dude: Water you thinking?
Me: You're drowning in my head.
Guess what's "tiiiimmeeeee ABDE?"
....yes, it is "long time no see."
Do you love water?
Then you love 75% of me!
Why did the dog cause the fight?
Because it was a bulldog.
What is a good time?
Why did the T-Rex 🦖 get a ticket?
He ran at a stomp light!
Mom: It's time for sleep.
Baby: Is that what you think, huh?
Mom: *gives baby pacifier*
Baby: Nice try, hobo.
Mom: Well, I'll come back later to see if he's gone asleep.
*few hours later*
Baby: *still awake*
Mom: Why IS HE NOT ASLEEP?!
Baby: Lol, I told you nice try haha.
Jasper doesn't like little girls and Bin Laden.
When is a door not a door?
When it is ajar.
What's the difference between a baby and an onion?
I cry when I chop onions.
I told her "I love you." She said, "I love me too."
Stop.
Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom?
Because it has a silent “p.”
The best part about Asian jokes is that the only people that can be offended can't see the jokes.
What do you call a rapper with a cold?
Lil Sneezy.
Why did the rapper bring a broom on stage?
To sweep the competition!
What do you call a man in a wheelchair with no legs?
Geo dude.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find Homeplate.
What's the difference between my dad and milk? There is no difference; they both left.
They say Trump got impeached, but he is an orange.