Worst Jokes Ever
What’s the difference between jail and my basement?
Some people are let out of jail.
What is the difference between the President of Ukraine and the President of the United States?
The President of Ukraine is a comedian, and the President of the United States is a joke!
What is an Iraqi kid's favorite game?
Minesweeper.
I saw my friend hang themselves. My response was, I guess they wanted to hang with someone.
I'm in jail for 5 minutes and I already got fucked 15 times. You don't have any idea how much I hate playing Monopoly with my dad.
I was going to tell a joke about babies, but I decided to abort.
What do the initials BIBLE stand for?
Bull In Book Lacking Evidence
Why did Tyrone drop his ice cream cone?
A: He got shot.
Little Johnny's dad was driving him to school when they came up on a couple in a convertible. It was apparent that they were arguing. You could then see the woman pull out a knife. Seconds later, his dad saw a penis land in the windshield. Worried little Johnny will see it, he quickly turned on the wipers and brushed it off.
"What was that, Dad?" asked lil Johnny. "Oh, just a bug," said his father. With a confused look on lil Johnny's face, he then says, "That bug sure had a big dick, didn't he?"
Q. What movie represents an orphan's life?
A. Spiderman: No Way Home.
I can tell a joke :)
Twinkle, twinkle, there's a car Coming like a shooting star. I will stand in the way. I will not be seen again. Are you happy I am dead? Now you made it to the end.
The orphanage was open in apps, but I didn’t see the home button.
The daughter milked her dad. It turns out it wasn't milk...
"the floor is lava!"
- everyone, Pompeii 79 A.D.
What do you call emos that live in the Bahamas?
Tropical depressions.
What kind of bee can't fly?
A KOBE.
Someone: When you suffer from depression and someone tells you to cheer up.
Me: My, what a great idea! Why didn't I think of that? ;)
So, a few hours ago my friend said I need to CUT it out with the s/h jokes... like... it's really not that deep?
Someone in London is stabbed every two minutes. Poor guy.
What do Phillip Adam and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.