Worst Jokes Ever

Due to the rising cost of ammunition, there will be no warning shots.

What is anonymous 🤔 oral masturbation? the politically correct word for anonymous gay fellatio from a 🕳 glory hole inside a 📖 adult book store

There are so many things going through my head. Sadly, none of it is a 9mm.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack was surprised to see she had different eyes, and that’s when he realized... Jack had fucked Jill’s daughter.

What is it called when an orphan takes a selfie?

Family photo.

So, I heard the CEO gave her daughter a really good spot in the company.

Everyone is mad, but I think it just goes to show that it pays to sleep with your boss.

I started beating my washing machine because it wasn't working, my wife started crying.

I wasn't staring at you; I was trying to figure out if that's your forehead or the moon.

So, I had an orphan friend, and he asked me, "How's your girlfriend?" I said, "I don't have one." He said, "I know, I just wanted to remind you." Then I asked, "How are your parents?" After that, I never saw him again.

I just found out that there is a racist stereotype about Asians being bad drivers, which isn't true... but if it is, then maybe Pearl Harbor was just an accident.

Johnny Depp once said in an interview: "I get older, my girlfriends stay the same age."

Maybe Johnny Depp's soulmate isn't born yet. We'll see in 20-25 years.

My life is like a broken pencil, it's pointless.

What do Paul Walker and I have in common? Neither of us have seen Fast and the Furious 7.

Me telling a depression and suicide joke in front of my friends.

My friends: ........ Oh wait, I don't have any, so nothing to worry about here.

What do you call a depressed person?

Me.

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? -- The wheelchair.

Billy: "I'm so used to having you in bed with me, I don't know if I'm ready for this long-distance relationship."

Sally: "Ohh, don't worry brother, I'll just be right down the hall..."

Imagine failing to commit suicide; you might as well go kill yourself.

I saw a man trying to rape a girl. I decided to help. She didn't stand a chance against both of us.

The lice in your head are starting to concern over deforestation.