Worst Jokes Ever

Why couldn't the NASA astronaut enter his rocket to leave Earth?

There wasn't enough space to fly it.

I hate it when couples get into a little fight and they change their Facebook status to "single." I have fights with my parents, but I don't change my Facebook status to "orphan."

Why do orphans have water with their cereal?

Their dad didn't come back with the milk.

What’s long and black?

The line at KFC.

Q: Why is Saturn a boy planet?

A: Because he has a nice ring to it.

Good Morning! Have a Great Day!

#Ijustwokeup

Why do orphans like Spider-Man?

100% of them are like him!

I need a new butt. This one has a hole in it.

I live inside my own world of make-believe. Kids screaming in their cradles, profanities. I see the world through eyes covered in ink and bleach. Cross out the ones who heard my cries and watched me weep. I love everything. Fire's spreading all around my room. My world's so bright. It's hard to breathe, but that's alright. Hush, shh.

Tape my eyes open to force reality (oh no, no). Why can't you just let me eat my weight in glee? I live inside my own world of make-believe. Kids screaming in their cradles, profanities. Some days I feel skinnier than all the other days, And some days I can't tell if my body belongs to me. I love everything. Fire's spreading all around my room. My world's so bright. It's hard to breathe, but that's alright. Hush, shh.

I wanna taste your content. Hold your breath and feel the tension. Devils hide behind redemption. Honesty is a one-way gate to hell. I wanna taste consumption. Breathe faster to waste oxygen. Hear the children sing aloud. It's music 'til the wick burns out. Hush.

Just wanna be carefree lately, yeah. Just kicking up daisies. Got one too many quarters in my pockets. Count 'em like the four-leaf clovers in my locket. Untied laces, yeah. Just tripping on daydreams. Got dirty little lullabies playing on repeat. Might as well just rot around the nursery and count sheep.

Yo mama so fat, they had to give her a license plate.

Who do you ask to wipe you? Your butler!

Roses are red, Tomatoes are redder. I think we both know, I like you better.

There is only one reason why I find women useful.

That is because they make sandwiches, but that is about it.

Hello, I am the WJE (WORST JOKES EVER) Bot. Like this post if you think it's good; dislike if you think it's bad!

My sis said only garlic and onions can make you cry.

So I threw an orange at her.

Poopoo man.

What did the store manager say when they ran out of toilet paper?

We’re wiped out!

When a guy falls, it hurts them there. When a woman falls, it hurts more.

What do you call a toothless bear?

A gummy bear.

Q: Why can't orphans play baseball?

A: They can't find home.