Worst Jokes Ever

You're so bald, Bob Hope would refer to you as "grandpa."

Jenga.

Why can't orphans watch PG movies? Parental guidance.

What do emo kids have in common with orphans?

They both depress'd on the inside.

Your hairline is more bent than James Charles' gender.

Why did the orphan cross the road?

Because he doesn't have parents.

Why did the autistic kid walk across a busy road?

He was chasing his mind and got hit by a car.

Why did Sally stare out the window for 24 hours straight?

Sally's used to being blind!

Man, we all have the one cool sibling, then the strong sibling, and then you, the one who plays on their iPad or computer all day. Then, when you are on vacation, you are doing nothing at all.

Cancer kids be like: "When I grow up... lol nevermind."

This joke never gets old. Just like the child.

Player 138 eliminated...

Couldn't believe how much of a bad mood my work mate was in this morning. So I decided to ask him what was the matter and if everything was OK with his wife, Flo.

He then broke down crying and said when he got home the night before, he caught his wife in bed with the plumber. I tried to console him as best as I could, but he just couldn't get over flow.

This isn't a joke, I repeat, this is not a joke. The plane in Lake Harriet is not in the lake. It is invisible because of the satellite pic, so there's no plane in Lake Harriet.

Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?

That depressed kid in class: Dead.

What do you call a monkey in a mine field?

BaBOOM!

An LDS preacher knocks on the door with a chalice of wine offering to do the sacrament.

The person living there points and says, "Begone, foul blood-drinker!"

And promptly the preacher bursts into flames, leaving nothing but ash.

I wasn’t close to my dad when he died. It’s a good thing he stepped on a land mine.

What do you call a group of depressed teenagers?

Suicide Squad.

Why do people in wheelchairs get bullied?

'Cause they can’t stand up for themselves.

My mom said, "Don't jump off, we need you."

I said, "No," then I jumped off a building and died.