Worst Jokes Ever
McDonald's and the Twin Towers are alike. McDonald's has a drive-through, and the Twin Towers had a fly-through.
I'm an orphan, lol.
Someone broke into my house and took my anti-depressants... I hope they're happy now.
I only cut to find out if I'm real or cake.
I have the heart of my mom, the face of my dad, the eyes of my grandpa, the ears of my grandma, and the hair of my uncle. We don't look anything alike; I just collect body parts.
Why did little Billy drop his ice cream cone?
Because he got hit by a bus.
What movie does an orphan want for Christmas? "Spiderman: Homecoming";)
When you go to an orphanage for a field trip: When the workers said, "I remember you as a kid."
A duck walks into a bar. The duck says to the bartender, "Hey bartender, got any bread?" The bartender says, "No." Then the duck says, "Hey bartender, got any bread?" The bartender says, "NO!" The duck says, "Hey bartender, got any bread?" The bartender says, "No, and if you say that one more time I will nail your bill to this bar!" The duck says, "Hey bartender, got any nails?" The bartender says, "No." The duck says, "Well then, bartender, got any bread?"
A pregnant wife and her husband were in a hospital as she was in labor. The doctor suggested using a machine that transfers the birth pains from the mother to the father. They agree, so the machine is used. 40%, the husband feels nothing, 70% still not feeling anything, 100%, nothing.
The doctor says it must be broken. When the pair return home, the milkman is dead in the front yard.
What do you call an epileptic in a lettuce field?
Seizure salad.
Did you know the F in Orphan stands for family?
What has an N, an I, two Gs, an E, and an R?
Ginger!
Why are dolphins so smart?
Because within three hours they can train a human to stand at the edge of the pool and feed them fish!
Why is it so easy bullying orphans?
They can’t tell their mom.
What do you call a Muslim guy in a bathtub?
A bath bomb 💣
I was walking down the street and I punched a white guy and then I was arrested for assault.
The next day after I got out, I punched a black guy and I was arrested for impersonating a police officer.
There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette. They were all trapped on an island, and the nearest shore was 50 miles away.
The redhead swam, trying to make it to the other shore. She swam 15 miles, drowned, and died.
The brunette swam 24 miles, drowned, and died.
The blonde swam 25 miles, got tired, and swam back.
Why is the bottom of the sea so dark?
Because Black people can’t swim.
I asked my mom where babies come from. She said I came from the adoption center.