Worst Jokes Ever
Me: You know what's the favorite slogan that Hindus like the most?
My friend: What?
Me: “kati supari kata paan katiyo ko bhejo pakistan.”
A teacher is teaching a class algebra. Timmy, you've worked out it is AK, but what is 59 minus 12? Timmy shakes his head, not knowing. The teacher asks, "How about AK 49 minus 2?" Timmy replies with um... The teacher becomes frustrated and yells, "What comes after AK, Timmy!?" The white kid at the back stands, shouts 47, and pulls the trigger.
Your forehead is so big that it could carry the passengers of the Titanic.
A plane is about to crash into the ocean, and the passengers are freaking out.
A woman stands up, takes off her clothes, and says, "Before I go, is there a man man enough to make me feel like a woman?"
A man stands up, takes off his shirt, and says, "Here, iron this!"
What's the difference between 63 cents and Princess Diana?
It's easier to scrape up 63 cents.
Hello everyone, to the first Hollow Knight meeting!
The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza. Instead, they got a plane.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
He can't run home.
What has two wings and a halo?
A Chinese telephone. (Wing, wing, halo.)
Daddy, I really miss you. Mummy changed my name to Tickle Timpson. Anyway, daddy I forgive you for abusing me.
What is a Karen called in Europe?
An American.
Why did no one turn up to John's funeral?
Because Sally wrote the invitations!
If you think long and hard, oral sex is like cannibals.
How many orphans does it take to change a light bulb?
Obviously more than three because my basement is still dark.
Abortion is becoming more and more expensive these days. So visit Ammu-nation and pick up an Armsan RS-X1 tactical shotgun. It comes with a free box of ammo and a three year warranty. Buy now, pay later.
I saw a kid wearing tatty rags on a curb, so I asked, "Are you an orphan?"
"Yes," he replied. "What gave me away?" He asked, "Your parents," I said.
22. Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set him on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
24. When does a joke become a dad joke? When it leaves you and never comes back.
31. My grandfather said my generation relies too much on the latest technology. So I unplugged his life support.
What did Cinderella wear to the beach?
Glass flippers.
Funny how "Hawking" rhymes with "talking" and "walking," and he can't do either.
And the first four letters of his Christian name spell "step," and he also can't do that.
Why don't cheetahs say goodbye?
Because they are not going to work.