When meeting her parents don't require you to leave the house
My teacher said he is gonna call my dad, i cant wait to meet him 🥰🥰🥰
So I meet with a therapist on a weekly basis, we talk about my depression and how it's been getting worse. Recently, I've been advised about my condition, and how I've been discussing to her about being suicidal, she's been very helpful throughout it, I was even told I can pay in advance from now on, so I don't have to worry about it later.
Father: “Son, you were adopted.”
Son: “What?! I knew it! I want to meet my biological parents!”
Father: “We are your biological parents. Now pack up, the new ones will pick you up in 20 minutes.”
A fat man meets a skinny man The fat man tells the skinny man: "when people look at you, they think the world's starving to death"
And the skinny man responds: "when they look at you, they know why"
Hey can't wait to meet you! So join the crippiling depression family!!
Why can't depressed people leave the maze?
Because their lives are the walls and they are to scared to meet the exit.
what did one lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? same time next month?
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
As a 13 year old, online dating is a tough thing.
Every time I meet someone new, they end up in jail.
"I'm not sure why my girlfriend's father doesn't like me."
"What was your first impression on him?"
"I told him, she calls me daddy too."
Can't wait to meet you! So join the Depression family! We open real soon! Try best to hold onto sanity!
A man goes into heaven and there he meets jesus. He asks Jesus what that broken clock is there for. Jesus says "that is mother teresa's clock it has never moved because she has never lied". "There is Abraham Lincolns clock. He has .lied twice so it has moved twice." "Where is Donald Trump's?" Ask's the man. Jesus answers "it is in my office, I am using it as a ceiling fan."
You meet the guy who invented 0, what do you tell him? Thanks for nothing!
Wow! That whiteboard is remarkable!
I asked my date to meet me at the gym today. She didn't show up. That's when I knew we weren't gonna work out
Indian guy and American guy in a wheelchair met in a Bar for drinks. American guy got drunk and fell on the sidewalk. Indian guy got drunk and walked away.
so I and my friend were talking this time, I asked them what they would do if they ever met rengoku they said that they would probably like shake his hand or sm but I said I would lick his forehead. wtf
So we were working with a new client at work and my boss farts, he said "a little gas never killed anyone
After a lord comes back from vacation, he meets the gardener at the gates of his park. Lord: Has something happened while I was gone? Gardener: Ah, nothing much, I just broke a shovel while I was burrying your dog. Lord: My dog died?! Gardener: Yes, it choked on the smoke when your mansion burnt down. Lord: My mansion?! How?! Gardener: Well, your wife was distraught and dropped a candle on the curtains. Lord: Why was she so distraught? Gardener: She received the news of your daughter being kidnapped. Lord: My daughter! Don't you have any positive news for me?! Gardener: Oh right! Your cancer test results!
