Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a nosy Mexican?
That's nacho business.
Yo mama so old, when she left the antique shop, the alarm went off.
"Why couldn’t the DJ keep any of the fish he caught?
He kept dropping the bass."
What do you call it when Panera Bread commits genocide?
Panera bloodshed.
What do you call it when someone lies to Panera Bread?
Panera misled.
Person with no arms: Even though I have no arms, I can do anything you guys can.
Me: If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏 If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏
Person with no arms: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Your hairline retreats from your face just like all the guys that look at you.
I would tell a 9/11 joke, but it would probably go up in flames.
I can’t take my dog to the park anymore.
Why?
The ducks keep trying to eat him.
Why would they do that?
Because he’s pure-bread.
Your hairline is so ugly, it’s receding from your face to never see you.
You're so bald that Disney uses your head for movie scripts.
A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a Martinus.
"Don't you mean a martini?" asks the bartender.
The Roman replies, "If I wanted a double, I would have asked for one!"
It's easy to tell if a skeleton is lying to you because you can see right through them.
What do rocks and girls have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?
Answer: a Carnivwhore.
What's the difference between MH370 and my dad?
Both disappeared, but one killed 239 people.
What is Hitler's least favorite fish?
Jewfish.
If your house is cold, just stand in the corner. It's always 90 degrees there.
Woman: I want a man who is 6 feet and 6 inches.
Man: Is 6 feet and 6 inches one thing or two?
Woman: Two, I want a man who is 6 feet and also is 6 inches.
Man: Shit!
What is better to have, autism, Down syndrome, or ADHD?