Titanic jokes

When you're going to Titanic: It's the best ship in the world.

When you know it's sinking: It's the poor ship!

I asked the Titanic an icebreaker question.

It couldn't answer.

Titanic is more bent than a hairline.

People: The Titanic is unsinkable!

Iceberg: Challenge accepted.

A Chinese drunk and a Jewish drunk are sitting together on a park bench.

After finishing his drink, the Jew takes his bottle and smashes it over the head of the Chinese drunk.

"What the hell was that for?" asks the Chinese man, rubbing his head.

"That was for Pearl Harbor!" replies the Jewish drunk.

"Pearl Harbor? That was the Japanese! I'm Chinese!" he exclaims in return.

"Eh, Chinese, Japanese, Korean... you're all the same to me," the Jewish man explains as he gets up to leave.

The next day, the two drunks are back on the same park bench. The Chinese drunk suddenly takes his bottle and smashes it over the head of the Jew.

"Why the hell did you do that?" the Jewish man stammers.

"That was for the Titanic!" explains the Chinese drunk.

"The Titanic? What are you talking about? No one attacked it, it sunk when it hit an iceberg!" the Jew replies.

"Eh, Iceberg, Goldberg, Greenberg... you're all the same to me," the Chinese drunk happily retorts.

Yo momma's so fat, she was the iceberg in the Titanic.

Nobody: People on the Titanic: *SCREAMING INTENSIFIES*

I asked my dad, "Are we there yet?" and he told me, "Don't worry, son, it will be a short ride!"

What do iPhones and the Titanic have in common?

There's no Jack!

There were people having sex when it started sinking. Legend tells when you go near the ship you can see semen, and if you listen close enough you'll hear them moaning.

Now that's a hell of a ghost story!

Flex tape can fix a sawed-in-half boat. Then how the f*** can it not fix the Titanic when it broke in half? Tell me!

“The Titanic is unsinkable!”

Iceberg challenge excepted.

Your fay.

Well, you're the thing that sunk the Titanic.

"That driving backwards, it creeping me out, you're gonna wreck or something." - Lightning McQueen.

Because that is what could have saved Titanic, and it wrecked.

Did you know the Titanic sank in water?

Titanic 1, Africa 0.

Why did the Titanic sink?

Because the people aboard are stupid.

I am the Titanic, and I'm looking for a place to crash tonight.

Time really freezes when you're stuck on a sinking ship.

What do you call someone with a big butt?

The Thightanic!

What is Titanic's favorite subject? Subtraction.