Time jokes
What takes 10 seconds to go SLPAT! on the ground?
9/11 victim!
What do you do if you see a nigger shot 50 times? Stop laughing and reload.
Yo hairline so far back, it goes back to Jesus on the cross!
I spent 10 hours applying makeup so I could look pretty when I was going to have sex with my partner.
I needn't have bothered.
The next day, it was smeared all over my face.
Why did the clock out the library?
It tocked too much!
Memes
What time is it? It's time for lunch.
*Quoted by Bubble Guppies*
Every woman will die in five seconds.
Mother: Dies.
Sister: Dies.
Girlfriend: Lives.
You: 🤬
What two things can you never have for breakfast?
Lunch and dinner!
10 years ago my dad went to get milk. He said when he got back, he was going to tell me a joke. That joke better be worth it!
You're so poor, you use the same toilet paper every time you take a poop!
Good Morning! Have a Great Day!
#Ijustwokeup
Producer: We need to stop testing out products on animals.
CEO: Shampoo companies do it all the time.
Fairchild Republic making the A-10 Thunder Bolt.
We were so poor that every time I passed by a butcher shop, I thought there had been a horrible accident.
Time for a Terraria joke.
What is a worm called when it is with a rich worm for his money?
A gold digger.
(play the game or watch some vids to understand)
Type this in your calculator:
5 days a week (type in 5),
6 different classes (type in 6),
7 hours a day (type in 7),
x
2 semesters (type in 2),
=
flip the calculator over ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°).
We can nip March Madness in the bud, but only if we detect the warning signs of brooding, anti-social February Fever.
He: I am 60 and I have to slog 12 hours a day to make a living. Do you call it life?
She: I am 28 and still a virgin, do you call it life?
Seven days without a pun makes one weak.
Okay, One time I there was my dog. But then the dog, it fell.
Then I f**ked my dog hard in the a**.
You know why the teacher punished Dairy Milk?
Answer: Because he was choco_'late' to school.