Things jokes
I masturbated by accident. I read the wrong thing And tested its factuality.
Well, it's been some good years now, haven't they? Being your own partner has never felt so together.
Random person: "What's one thing your ex gave you that you can't get rid of?"
Man: *Shows a picture of his child.*
When I hotline bling, I only need one thing.
Jim was caught beating a man up. Brooklyn took a picture of his license plate with her phone and told him, "Your life is ruined!" So Jim took a picture of her, and the next thing you know, he said, "Now my phone is ruined!"
Did you know that chips taste like the baked potato in things called bags of chips?
I can now cross it off my bucket list
A dog walked into a tavern and said, "I can't see a thing. I'll open this one."
The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
A dog walked into a tavern and said, “I can’t see a thing. I’ll open this one.” The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
What thing can an orphan do best?
Stay at home alone.
Anthony Blinken's life sucks, and getting COVID-19 positive is the only positive thing that ever happened in his entire life!
When the ugliest cat looked at you, then you search up the ugliest thing in the world, you show up.
Q: What is the worst thing to hear your surgeon say?
A: Oops, I dropped my lollipop!
Organise my brother's bucks party and got confused when he asked for a hot 22 year old for I brought him 20 two yr Olds....
Good thing my brother's a little bit different.
What is the last thing that goes through a suicide bomber's mind?
His arse.
"If you yeet one thing that has been yoted, the yeet gods will help you" - Chris Tyson, MrBeast's friend, and your mom >:)
What are two things that an orphan can’t have?
Two parents.
Do you know when the thing of you when the was is where you and if you when you where if I and you where in the thing is where yes?
I used to have a phobia of pogo sticks. Those things always made me jump.
What's the funniest thing about being ringside at a UFC fight?
When you look around and all of the spectators are wearing white gowns and fuzzy socks, and you realize you aren't at a UFC event, you're watching your fellow patients fight to the death at a psychiatric facility.
"Jesus loves you" is a wonderful thing to hear in church.
But a horrible thing to hear in a Mexican prison.
What's the worst possible thing to be playing during the funeral of a bridge-collapse victim?
Fall Guys.